This is Life

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

My Children Will Glow

Ok everybody, here is what you have all been waiting for ... my new address, of course! So, you can send all of your donations to The Dean Foundation at 新潟県刈羽郡刈羽村大字刈羽 1411-9. Good luck with that.

Anyway, today was my second day at my new job and I am trying not to fall asleep. You see, here is how things have progressed to this point. On second thought, its really not that interesting so I won`t get into it. Basically, I have had no time to move from my previous job to my new one so I am all over the place at the moment. Within the next week, however, I should be settled in my new town of Kariwa, which also happens to be home to the world`s largest nuclear powerplant. Personally, I`d prefer if it were famous for a waterslide than a nuclear powerplant, but I guess that is better than if it was famous for being home to the world`s largest stockpile of sulphur, because that would be unpleasant. I could also be in Edmonton so I will just count my blessings.

As I was saying, today was my second day, but it was my first day to meet some of the elementary students that I will be teaching. Not sure exactly where they pick this habit up, but they sure do like touching foreigner`s private parts. Oh, and my particular favorite requires some participation. Put your palms together and lock your fingers, leaving only your thumbs and forefingers pointed. At this point you should be able to successfully stick up and bank where all the employees are complete idiots because you hands should look like a gun. Ok, now I want you to go find someone that is standing up. Did you find someone? Ok, good. Now, sneak up behind them and try to poke them in the anus. Now wasn`t that fun for everyone? Seriously, who starts this stuff? I mean, this is a pasttime for every kid in the country. Why can`t they just pick their nose or something? Wait, they do that too. But in all honesty, it was a lot of fun to play with the kids. I am sure I will enjoy my new role (junior high 3 days a week; elementary 1 day a week; kindergarten 2 days a month), but I still miss high school. Oh, I should probably say that I would prefer that I am not named as a co-defendent in any sexual harassment lawsuits that are brought against you in the unlikely event that someone didn`t appreciate the finger-up-the-butt-poke.

Other than that, well, as I said before, there is lots going on, but it is not particularly newsworthy so I will spare you. School is now out until September so aside from a few festivals and amazing fireworks shows I don`t think I will be getting up to too much. I`ll try get some picks of my new, massive house that I pay no rent on and live in by myself as soon as possible, as well as some videos. Now that I mention it, I had a teacher record my farewell speech during the summer closing ceremony at my high school so you might find that interesting - Dean speaking in very poor Japanese!

Finally, I just realized that you can send me any donations to the address I listed because I didn`t tell you the postal code. That, and the fact that most of your computers can`t read Japanese characters so it probably just looks like a jumble of weird symbols anyway. So, here is the actual address that you should be able to read.

945-0307 (postal code, not the phone number)
Ooaza Kariwa 1411-9


At 7:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Happy to hear that your new job is adding new enjoyments to your life. Hope your packing and moving goes smoothly. Sapporo is amazing so far. So nice to be able to walk around all day and not feel like you just lost your body weight in sweat. Was around 24 today and the locals were complaining of the heat.
Looking forward to the pics!

At 9:58 AM, Anonymous Crustytuna said...

hahaha..i heard about that fingers-as-gunpoint-up-the-butt thing. It's like this crazy game, kind of like "homosaywhat?" game, only it's a little more invasive, and oh so distinctly japanese.
well, have fun with the move, and living in your big ol' house. you should get a pet. you know, like a fish or something. just so you're not the only mobile life form in the place.
anyway, enjoy kariwa and perhaps i'll catch you online sometime.


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